1 Corinthians 7:1-7
7 Now regarding the questions you asked in your letter. Yes, it is good to abstain from sexual relations.[a] 2 But because there is so much sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman should have her own husband.
3 The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. 4 The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife.
5 Do not deprive each other of sexual relations, unless you both agree to refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time so you can give yourselves more completely to prayer. Afterward, you should come together again so that Satan won’t be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 6 I say this as a concession, not as a command. 7 But I wish everyone were single, just as I am. Yet each person has a special gift from God, of one kind or another.
Throughout the course of history, we have been obsessed with love. Love cast a thousand ships to sea, love changes everything, love is all you need. We have fought wars, written songs and made movies to celebrate love. However, not many people know how to make love last.
We assume that we do. We get married and make vows that we will stay together forever. However, 42% of marriages in their UK still end in divorce. No one gets married planning to get a divorce but few people make a plan to not get a divorce either. We just hope we will be ok. Paul, in this passage gives some practical tips for a healthy relationship. These are not everything that are required for you to thrive but are helpful none-the-less.
Faithfulness
Each man should have his own wife, and each woman should have her own husband
Paul states that each man should have one wife and that each woman should have one husband. This may seem basic but he was writing in a culture where relationships were often for political or social gains and pleasure was sought outside the home. He is affirming the biblical picture of marriage as a place of love, stability and fulfilment where each partners is satisfied, and where children may be created and raised in a loving and stable environment.
Mutual submission
The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife.
Marriage is the context that Paul gives for sexual intimacy and he argues that it is for the benefit of both partners. Each person goes into the relationship to serve and satisfy the other. This does not give license to allow a partner to abuse, coerce or bully the other. It is about love, respect and mutual submission.
Generosity with our intimacy.
Do not deprive each other of sexual relations
Some good advice I heard from a couple when we were getting married was to never use intimacy as a bargaining chip. Do not deny intimacy because they messed up or you want to strong arm them into making a decision. Sex within a marriage is not a power struggle but a place of generous intimacy.
He presents the church with a picture of a healthy relationship where each person is fulfilled and loved. A relationship which can be a foundation for family, ministry and stability. It is a picture that is as contested today as it was when he wrote it.
How does this contrast with what we see in culture today?
